angry_happyDo you struggle with attracting clients or closing the sale? Or are you struggling to land that next job opportunity? It could have something to do with your energy! Okay, this might sound all woo-woo, but these days, science can measure your energy as far as 10 feet out from your body. That’s because your heart has more intelligence than your brain does. Science can measure when people are anxious and stressed or conversely, relaxed and calm! Everything around us is energy! Some of you know that I’m a Reiki practitioner, and that’s all about working with energetic fields and flows. So to me, it makes perfect sense!
If you’re still skeptical, think about when you’ve been in a situation where someone walked in a room and you could sense they were in a bad mood before they even opened their mouth to say something, right? I’ve experienced this in my own household when my husband has had a bad day. And the opposite is true as well, when someone walks in a room and they’re in a great mood, you can feel their bubbly energy! It can be contagious!! (Just look at the photos here. How does the one on the left make you feel when you look at it? How about the one on the right?)

So then wouldn’t it make sense for you to be aware of YOUR energy when having a business meeting, an important conversation or even a job interview?

In a recent session with one of my clients, this became very clear to me. We were talking about an upcoming meeting she had scheduled with a potential client. And one of the things we were working on was how to improve her skills at closing the sale. She expressed to me that she really needed this client! And through the phone, I could feel her anxiety! So I asked her how she felt when thought about “needing the client”. She said “stressed and anxious”. That anxiety can come across as desperation to a potential client or that you’re pouncing on them. And because people don’t like being sold to these days, it can be a real turnoff and they might literally back away! I’ve seen it happen!

Then I asked her if she believes in her heart that the service she provides helps people. And she said “yes, of course!” Then I suggested, “what if you thought ‘how can I help this person?’ instead of ‘I need this client!’ How does that make you feel?” She said “more relaxed and open to new possibilities”. Now I ask you, if you walk into the meeting feeling relaxed and open, don’t you think this potential client is going to feel more relaxed rather than anxious and stressed? They want to feel open to new possibilities, too! That’s why they’re meeting with you!

I also had a conversation with someone recently who is trying to decide her next career move and is looking at new job opportunities. She had a phone interview with someone for a potential job that seemed to go well and had an in-person meeting coming up. I told her about this simple idea of going into this job interview with the thought “how can I help this person or this company?” vs. “I NEED this job!!” She tried it and here’s what she reported back: The meeting went very well and she felt an easy sense of connection with the interviewer, they had great conversation. And though she and this woman mutually agreed that this particular job opening was not the right fit(she was overqualified), this woman thought her husband’s company(a totally different company) might have an opening that would be a better fit for her! The husband called her the very next day and she got the feedback that they were looking for someone with her kind of great attitude!! Since then it’s turned into a job offer! I’d say that’s evidence right there!! 

Many of us can feel the stress and anxiety of needing more clients or to land that next job, believe me I can relate! But the more I practice focusing on “how can I help this person?” vs. “I NEED more clients or more money”, it seems that the person I’m talking to ends up asking how can they work with me vs. me asking them. This is just one aspect of the process I use with clients so it’s only part of the equation to success. But it’s one of the most important components.

It’s so hard for us in this busy, crazy world to tune in to our energy. Things are so frenetic most of the time, we don’t even take a moment to breathe. But it doesn’t take a huge effort to stop and calm yourself and shift your energy. Here are a few of techniques you can try:

  1. This works when you’re headed to an appointment, going to a networking event or even arriving home after a long, busy day. Give yourself 5 minutes, though you can do it in as little as 2 or 3. If you’re in your car, once you’ve arrived and parked, shut off the car, no music or radio, and notice the silence. (if it’s hot, keep a window open) Just notice the silence. Take 3 long slow inhales and exhales. Close your eyes. Take 3 more. Begin to feel a sense of calm, then ask yourself, “how can I help this person(or company, or these people I’ll be meeting)?” take one more deep breath. Open your eyes and go for it!
  2. If you’re a visual person like me, this one really helps. It’s a great exercise I learned at a seminar about Heart Math. Take 3 long slow inhales and exhales but, close your eyes first and visualize your breath going through your heart. Swirling in and around your heart. You can put your hands over your heart as well, if you want help to connect. Tune in to love and compassion for the people you are about to meet. They have a need you can fulfill. They might be stressed because they’re overworked, or overwhelmed. Feel compassion and put yourself in their shoes for a moment. Take one more deep breath through your heart and open your eyes. Ask yourself “how can I help this person (or this company)?” One more breath with your eyes open and then go for it! If you go to the Heart Math web site, on the home page there’s a video with Tony Robins doing another version of this, which is great too, where he incorporates feeling gratitude. It’s proven statistically to work in just 2 minutes.
  3. Write a list of positive words like, “happy, joyful, peaceful, positive, excited, etc.” Just brainstorm at least 10 or 15 words. Look at them and see how they make you feel. (if you want to experiment some time, draw a line and write negative words on the opposite side of the line, you’ll see how focusing on the negative words can bring your energy down. So don’t do this before a meeting!!)

If you practice the heart visualization and get used to doing it, you can just visualize in your mind with your eyes open and can apply it in any stressful situation with just a few breaths. It’s amazing what these easy techniques can do. Try them and journal about the results then post them on the Encore Revolution Facebook Page or post a comment below this blog post. I’d love to get feedback or hear some success stories!